A Letter to my 18 Year Old Self

So tomorrow I turn twenty and bid my teenage years goodbye. Although this is a scary thought, I am ready to move on and embrace everything my twenties have to offer. Even though it was just two years ago, I feel since turning 18 I have grown and learned so much so I decided to get a bit personal and post a letter to my eighteen year old self..

Dear eighteen year old Michelle,

You are in your final few months of secondary school and have many big decisions to make. It is time to apply to college courses and decide what to do next. While everyone around you will become more and more stressed you'll continue on being your laid back self and not let it phase you. Work hard in school, the result of not working as hard as you could have and not believing in yourself is that you have doubts about your college course today. Don't worry though, you will be happy in what you're doing and have plenty of time later if you want to change career path. You will thank yourself later for truly enjoying the last year of school instead of getting too stressed. It will end up being one of the best years you have had with your big group of friends who will forever hold a place in your heart. 

Document everything- take pictures and print them out, save concert tickets and cards because they are all so nice to look back on. When you open the box that you threw anything of slight significance into it will leave you laughing, crying and reminiscing about all of the amazing times you have had. Be more confident and express what you love! You will regret your shy ways later. You care way too much about what other people think but at the end of the day, the nameless faces you saw walking the school corridor didn't care what you were doing, they had their own lives to live. Live in the moment, say YES to opportunities and put your phone down because the funny memories you make will stay with you forever. Enjoy yourself but don't get too drunk, you know your limits so respect them even if the drink is free. 

You are about to experience so many new people and new things so embrace them with open arms, you won't regret it. The main and significant relationship you have will teach you so much about yourself and others around you. They will make you laugh through the highs and lows and always be there for you. You will have the best time together but as they say, all good things come to an end and even though you will miss them, you'll know the timing was right and it couldn't have ended better. Being your first love, they will always hold a place in your heart so remember it's ok to feel sad when they're gone. You need to learn to let people go. If someone doesn't love you and want the best for you then stop holding on- that goes for everyone in your life. It may seem tough at the time but it gets easier as time goes on.

Exercise more- that tiny figure you once had won't last forever so get used to exercising while you can (even though I know you won't!). Body confidence will become a huge problem, something you didn't see coming however everyone around it is feeling it too, you're not alone.

You have so much to look forward to in the coming two years. The Debs, a night that you dreamed about and looked forward to for years will finally come and it will exceed expectations. No need to fret, you will have a date and even get to two more debs which you will also have an amazing time at.  You'll dance all night, wear an amazing dress and not have a care in the world! Who knew that the J1 to California that you have always talked about would become a reality in 2016? I'm currently getting set up and ready to go so yep- get excited!

Although at the time you couldn't see it, getting up and leaving the house was the best thing you could have done for yourself. When you actually start going to college and meeting new people you will feel so much happier- productivity makes you feel great. Getting outside, talking and laughing is so therapeutic so just do it! It's ok to have a lazy morning watching Love, Rosie and sleeping in until 1pm but filling your days with laughter, good friends and family is the key to a good day. Something I admire about you is how comfortable you are in your own company. Although I just told you to go out and experience things, if a party or a night out comes up and you don't want to go, thats ok too. Something that you will have to deal with is the fact that you're kind and a people pleaser, some people in your life will recognise this and manipulate you. You do you and go with your gut!

Lastly you need to look around and appreciate everyone in your life, they are all amazing! Some may come and go but recognise that they have entered your life for a reason and they should be thanked for that. You will lose sight of this appreciation for quite a while but when it comes back you will be more thankful and loving than ever, even if you may not express it all of the time.

Keep your head up and enjoy yourself,
Love from your older, yet not much wiser, 20 year old self x

Thank you so much for reading, if you got this far I applaud you! Writing this letter took so much thought, editing and tears and I'm so happy I could share it with you all. I truly recommend writing a letter to your younger self, it is such an emotional experience but so worth it in the end. Thanks again for reading and make sure to let me know what you would tell your younger self in the comments below!

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